Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Nerds Rock!

Note the following e-mail thread from here at work.

Names have been redacted to protect the guilty...

To :
From: XXXX

Subject: Hung processing this morning


As a preemptive strike... XXXX told me the CRI.PROCESSNATMSINMSGS has run since 9:08. I'm guessing some user had a lock on something yet again. Would you please take a look? Also, could you let me know who the offender is.

What are your thoughts on providing scripts/privileges to whomever is on call to check to see if there are locks on this job and to kill the offender's session?

Now knowing there is no way on Earth they were going to let the requester have the access needed to keep things running smooth (its a government thing) and knowing that this is the kinda of thing that starts wars I decided to throw a little levity in to defuse the situation and "replied all" with the following...
To :

From: Nerdyredneck
Subject: Hung processing this morning

What were you thinking! Mine gott man, do you have any idea how much whirling and twirling and knocking we have going on in this system here?

If they gave you the level of access you requested then it is possible, even probable that squirrels could collide on the exercise wheels, then fly off into space, fall through a black hole and travel back in time to a primordial earth. At some point it then becomes inevitable that squirrel DNA would be infused in the primordial ooze and all life on earth would become squirrel based. Humans would never have existed.

So seriously, do you want that kind of responsibility on your shoulders? DO YOU?

I did not think so.



So for the last 10 days or so since I sent that out I have been receiving nearly daily e-mails from team members with the subject of TOO LATE containing um, interesting photos, here is a sampling....

Avast thar maties and heave too fer a code walk through.

Kin ah go to da salt lick Pa? Kin I?

Die Infidel pig!

And now young Jedi, you. will. die!

Nerds are just sooooo awesome!

Then of course we have one from me from over three years ago... Former Pop Star Gunned Down


tammy said...

Hilarious! Who knew nerds could be so funny?

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

@Tammy, well all the nerds knew.

That is part of our mission statement here, educating the masses on the various glorius details of nerd based life!