Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I command thee!

Ok, I hesitate to tell this story. *I* think it is hilarious but it may come off a tad perverted. (I can already hear CrazyMamma "Tad? TAD?)

However, the highest compliment I have ever been paid on this site was by former reader Taj and Jules from House of Jules. They once debated in my comments whether I was perverted perfectly or perfectly perverted. Awwww, isn't that sweet? :)

But here it goes I am going to let this one out of the bag.

I was once on this dating site that when you sent e-mail you could look in your sent folder and see the status of it in the recipients inbox., unread, read and kept, deleted.

So I saw the profile of a very attractive women and her profile said she was a sub and looking for a dom. I was married for a looooooong time so I actually had to google these terms and go "Ohhhhhhh!" I usually Tailor an e-mail to the profile (to show I actually cared enough to READ it not just e-mailing to pretty photo's.)


 However, I'm not just not a Dom type guy, I actually *like* women and want a partner not a slave, so I went ahead and wrote my usual kind of letter. It was deleted almost immediately. I pondered that for a bit and an evil idea crept into my head.  
 
I wrote the following e-mail to her the next day (paraphrased from memory. )
 
Do as I tell you! Do not hesitate!
Right now get your camera.
Find a mirror.
Take your top off.
Take a picture of your breasts.
Send me the picture.
NOW!
 
DO NOT MAKE ME TELL YOU AGAIN!
 
She did not send me a picture of her boobs BUT SHE DID NOT DELTE THE LETTER! It was flagged "read and kept" until her account was off lined!
 
Now I thought that was hilarious! It was backwards world. The letter that SHOULD have been deleted was kept! (we can debate if my sweet letter should have been kept or not. Lots of women read my letter, look at my photo/profile and delete. say la vie) but without a doubt a "SHOW ME YOUR BOOBS"  letter should be junked immediately!
 
Of course if you disagree, by all means feel free to send me a pic or two! :) As Ron White says, "Once you've seen one set of boobs, you know you want to see the rest of them"

(speaking of Taj, she would prolly be the one emailing me commanding me to send her a pics of my chest!)!

PS! It just NOW occurs to me years too late that if I had sent that sub girl another e-mail getting more bossy and threatening punishment I probably would have gotten a picture not too mention a date! ROFL!)

((God as long as we are on stories labeled Internet dating hell, remind me to tell you all about the nursing student! Oy Vey!))

9 comments:

House of Jules said...

I kept it because I thought your command was funny.

House of Jules said...

hahahahaha

tammy said...

You? Ask for pictures of boobs? No way.

House of Jules comment was perfect.

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

@Jules - "I kept it "

OH! Well then you owe me a picture! :) Well, now that I think back you owe me two pics now: If you remember this old post you were supposed to send a picture after you bought these...

http://nerdyredneck.blogspot.com/2008/01/you-should-give-him-fair-warning.html
Lol!

@Tammy - I do love boobs. Most men do. For the life of me I can not understand why women are so selfish with them. People blame religion but I don't get that- God made boobs and he made men love them so for the life of me I can understand what the big secret is! :) With all that said I am not normally gauche enough to ask for nudie pics.

House of Jules said...

HA! I guess I don't take orders very well! :)

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

Well Jules that makes you a pretty crappy sub then huh? lol

No wonder your account went off line! :)

Logcpt said...

I would send you pics of a bunch of boobs, but the stopped letting camera's in to Congress. I guess you will have to go to C-Span for your "fix".

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

logcpt - Well played sir! Well played! :)

Sorcerer said...

Yeah..the world is running backwards..Reverse Darwinism in progress.


ROFL @Logcpt's comment